How My Life Collapsed And How I Fell Into Nothing-ness?

I was sitting in a dark room in the heart of the always busy capital and I was tormented by emotional agony.

Everything I had ever believed in collapsed.

My life, my job, my career, my relationship - all shattered with an ear-splitting crash.

Bitterness choked my throat and troubling questions emerged at the same time. Why did this have to happen this way? Why does the fate punish me so? I failed during the hard trials and fell into deep water. I could find no point of my life anymore and sunk deep in my self-pity, when a thought conceived: I cannot live like this any longer.

While I was suffering in the deepest hell of self-pity, sorrow and hopelessness, and intensified the raging madness inside me by picturing the script of my own funeral, something unexpected and life-changing happened:

I fell into nothingness.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR (There is a mysterious human dimension..)

There is a mysterious human dimension, the recognition of which shatters all our ideas about  who we are, where we come from

and what our mission in this world is.

This is the realm of Consciousness:

the final scientific and spiritual mystery.

This blog is about the mysteries and miracles of Consciousness.

About the living  spirit in action which, dressed up in the machinery of your body, discovers itself and the wonders of the world.

About The Author:  Ervin K. Kery

What is the nature of the human soul, the human spirit? 

Why do we think the way we actually do? 

How our habits and roles evolve? 

What are we, beyond our roles? 

What is the mysterious Life that lives in me, and experiences the world through me?

I have long been fascinated by the secret of human existence, the mystery of the human soul/spirit. There has to be something that is beyond social roles and conditioning. There has to be a ”foundation,” which lives in me as life, and to which learnt and acquired thoughts and habits, the programmed patterns–the personality–are attached. Psychology, still not a full-fledged science, only studies the conditioned patterns of behaviour, that is, the Ego (it is therefore possible to refer to it as "egology" - the science of the Ego), but it does not address the issues that precede the emergence of the Ego, not does it deal with whatever is beyond the Ego. What is the eternal factor that follows us from our birth to our death, no matter what a mature and powerful personality we believe we have?